A Difficult Week

It has been an exceptionally difficult week.

I went back to work.  That was 4 hours each morning.  Every afternoon but one someone had doctors appointments.  Sometimes there were two in an afternoon which made for very crazy days!

We have had numerous discussions on whether Zine is going to begin the process of moving to short term disability or just what to do.   Vacation Days are gone…so we have issues if he were to go back and got sick.   We started discussing short term disability even before this last chemo treatment.  Please pray that we would have great wisdom.   There are many, many things to consider in this process to the point that it can literally make your head spin!!

Krisann continues to really struggle!  Our hearts are broken for her.  We had hoped that when we got home she would settle down but she hasn’t.  It has definitely been HARD!  We have her an appointment next week to be evaluated as to whether there is some anxiety that needs to be medicated or if we just need better parenting skills.

I have had some health problems which adds to the stress level in our home.  I am definitely not ready to share the details of what is going on, but we do cherish prayers as I navigate doctors appointments for me as well as the rest of our family!  But I think I have said it before, but I will say it again, stress does terrible things to our bodies!!

I have had a huge struggle this week of feeling like a failure!  There is a circumstance that is overwhelming to me.  And I see no way around or through it!  So it leaves me feeling hopeless!  And I wouldn’t lie if I didn’t say this situation sends much fear in my heart.  The struggle is real!!!

On the other side of difficult is gratefulness!!

We are grateful to be at the end of 2 weeks post chemo!!  Yoo hoo!!!!  We also enjoyed our first visitors this week.  One of Zine’s friends visited on Sunday.  And Tuesday night a couple that we love came and hung out with us for a bit.  We were so grateful for both of those visits!!

We are very grateful for the cards and acts of service we have received.  We have been loved well!  And the meals….I still don’t have it in me to walk in my kitchen so the meals have been a total blessing!!

Zine is feeling better and stronger!  No more sleeping 6 hours during the day.  Some days he has managed to not nap.  Others he has definitely needed a nap!!

As I look back over the past month, I have no idea how we have survived!  Guess that’s called God’s grace!

Continue to pray for us!  The road ahead is long and difficult in more ways than one.  So just pray that we would rely on God’s strength and not our own.


Wife of 20+ years. Mom to 3 children. Love sharing my life with weary hearts so that we can know the One who is Good, who is in Control, and Whose strength is made perfect in our weaknesses.