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Oh my, how fast life can change.  At least it did for us last night.

As we were getting ready for bed last night, Zine fell out of his wheelchair.  Literally, he fell out of his chair.  He was leaning forward and wasn’t able to hold himself and into the floor he went.  We’ve had several talks about him leaning forward in his chair.  He has lost so much core strength that it is not safe for him to do that.  Today, he has no recollection of those conversations.  🙂

I am so grateful for Pilates helping me get stronger and better able to handle him.  Alongside Krisann’s help, I was able to get him out of the floor and into his chair.  At this point, he tells me his leg hurts.  So I begin to assess his leg; it takes me a total of 30 seconds to realize his leg was broken.  So I load him up and drop him off at the ER.  (Can I say I hate the COVID rules?)

X-rays revealed both his tibia and fibula were broken.  At first, they were going to transfer him to Huntsville Hospital for surgery.  However, because of the blood thinner he takes, he has to come off blood thinner and wait three days before he can have surgery.  Considering the three day wait and COVID rules, the doctor reluctantly let me bring him home.

It has not been easy going.  The extra weight from the boot keeps him from being able to lift or move his leg.  He doesn’t have the strength to move the added weight.  Therefore, he is totally dependent on me for movement.  Even after I got him settled in the bed last night, whenever he would need to move, I would have to get up and help him readjust in the bed.

So between being 1:30 am getting home from the hospital to the dogs being disturbed to Zine needing help, my sleep was minimal. Not to mention, my heart was not at peace.

Monday morning, we are to call the orthopedic doctor that was on call, and Zine will be headed to surgery early next week.  We will know more details after we visit with the orthopedic doctor on Monday.  When Zine left the ER, he had the understanding they would be putting plates in his leg.

The sad news is that this was his good leg.  This leg he still had a little bit of control over.  His left leg is like a peg leg.  He can’t move it at all and it stays rigid all the time.  With this good leg, or what used to be a good leg, he was able to move some, and it was the leg that allowed him to transfer pretty easily.

The only transfer for him now is with a gait belt and a transfer board.  Let me just say, I have my hands full.

Conner helped me get him showered today.  Zine won’t be getting a shower when it’s just me and him.  It is definitely a two-person job right now.  Conner is without a job at the current moment, and most of Conner’s classes are online, so he will be more available to come to help me which is a blessing. It’s nice to walk through these struggles and have adult children!  In previous years, I’ve had teenagers and a young child.

I lost my dad two and a half weeks ago, so my emotional state was not at it’s best, to begin with.  Last night compounded my emotions.  There is one thing we have learned when I am stressed, I don’t eat. Therefore, in my last season of stress and grief, I became extremely sick.  I will not lie and say that my eating is great.  It is not.  However, as I was sharing with Chloe recently, there is a difference this time, and that is I know I have an eating disorder and I have learned so much about it over the last year and a half.  However, the eating battle is wearisome at times.

There are many ways you can pray for us.

• Pray that I can take care of myself so that I can take care of my people.
• Pray for physical strength to transfer and move Zine.
• Pray for my children who are adding another “major life change” to their life story.
• Pray for our emotional status and that we would respond appropriately.
• Pray for our relationships with one another.  Stress can take a toll on relationships. So far, all is good, and I would like for it to stay that way.
• Pray that Zine’s pain would be controlled.  He starts asking for pain medicine approximately 30 minutes or so before he can have some more.  We switched medicines this afternoon, so hopefully, that is going to sustain his pain a bit better.
• Pray for Zine’s emotional well being.  Giving up even more pride and dignity is difficult.
• Pray that we would quickly and easily get home health set up on Monday and get me some much-needed help in here.

I’m sure there are many other ways you can pray, but that’s what comes to my mind initially.

In the middle of this nightmare, I want to tell you what God has done.

I have been feeling very disconnected and alone.  I was already struggling with that feeling when covid hit.  I believe covid has helped isolate and disconnect everyone.  So isn’t it just like God in the middle of my overwhelmed moment, that He showered His love on me.  He didn’t just shower His love, He saturated His love on me.

Even before last night, a friend had reached out and was prompted to send us a financial gift.  At midnight last night, I had a friend texting me asking what she could do.  After posting an update this morning, I had multiple, and I do mean multiple messages from others stepping up to take to gymnastics, bring meals, offering help of all kinds, etc.  I’ve had friends from far away texting and messaging that they were praying and wished they lived here.  My extended family has been reaching out asking if they need to come and help and letting me know they were praying.

God has taken each one of those contacts and saturated my heart with His love.  I needed that.  My heart is more at peace this evening. Or maybe I’m just so doggone tired I have no emotion??  I’m going to go with God has given my heart peace.

How can you help?

• First, recognize this is not a week and done sort of thing.  This is a several many weeks ordeal, and we may never regain what has been lost.
• Pray.
• Feel free to schedule a visit.  Interaction with others helps us. And we love when people just come pray with us. We are so over COVID isolation.
• If you are a strong guy, work from home, and don’t live far from me, shoot me a text and remind me of your desire and willingness to help if I get in a bind transferring. Sometimes in those moments, my mind doesn’t think.
• I have meals this week, but a list will be posted later for some future meals.

Those are the main things right now.  So much of what I need is simply muscle and backup and I can’t always predict when a move or transition needs to happen. The other thing that I have learned from previous situations, if God lays something on your heart, then be obedient.  I’m always amazed at how God uses you all at just the right times in my life.

As I was reminded today, this is what the body of Christ does.  If it were someone else in my situation, I would be ministering in any way God laid on my heart.  So I need to be accepting of what other’s offer.  No matter how much practice I have had at receiving, it is still difficult for me.