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The Struggle of Finding Your Voice

Join me in welcoming Rebekah Wright to the blog today.  Finding your voice.  I remember as I transitioned to adulthood, it was a difficult transition to learn to use my voice.  Rebekah gives us tips from Esther about finding our voice.  However, the struggle of finding your voice isn’t just for transitioning to adulthood.  Even as an adult, I often find times where I struggle to use the voice that God gave me.

Finding Your Voice: Lessons From Esther

“Find your voice” is a phrase that I have heard repeatedly this past year.

All my life, I grew up leaning on what others taught me about God and the Christian way of life, never allowed to question when something seemed off theologically, and never allowed to make my own decisions.

Eventually, I believed the lie that no one cared what I thought. Consequently, I became extremely shy and quiet, afraid to say how I felt about things. I could not find my voice.  And I certainly didn’t understand why so many traumatic things happened to me in the process.

In 2021, things began to shift for me as I started trying to figure out who I am, the purpose of the trauma I faced, and what I believe about God and the world. It was a journey full of trial and error, but this taught me a valuable lesson:

Find your voice and use it when you know what you want.

You have to do what’s best for you, not what others think is best for you.

Fast forwards a couple of months, and my fiancé and I recently saw the story of Esther in the theater. I have always looked up to her as a role model for standing up for what you believe in.

Raised by her cousin Mordecai, taken from her home and people, and now living in the king’s palace, Esther was thrust into a very Gentile world afraid to say who she was (a Jew; see Esther 2:20), and she had to grow up fast.

Much like me, she knew what she believed and would never falter from that, but also, things weren’t as they should be.

If she spoke up, there were consequences. And that is how I felt: I would be disowned by the people I loved the most if I dared to make my own decisions as an adult, even if those decisions weren’t wrong.

So when is it okay to speak up? Sometimes situations present themselves; It’s how we handle those situations before God that matters. “There is a season and a time for every purpose under the heaven.” When the wicked Haman tried to kill all the Jews (see chapter 3), it was Esther’s “time to speak.” (Ecc 3:1-8).

Esther was afraid for not being summoned by the king that he might kill her – “if I perish, I perish” (4:16) — as she waited for the perfect opportunity to tell the king about Haman’s plan…It took her three tries before she dared to speak up.

Sometimes, it feels like dying on the inside to go against the grain of popular thought and opinion.

As one who hates confrontation, this is a powerful lesson for me.

As Job 13:15 says, “Though He slay me, yet will I trust Him.” Esther did not let fear stop her; but instead heeded Mordecai’s advice: “For if you remain completely silent at this time, relief and deliverance will arise for the Jews from another place, but you and your father’s house will perish. Yet who knows whether you have come to the kingdom for such a time as this?” (Esther 4:14)

The Bible records that Esther took three days to fast and pray before going to the king. She had the support of others who fasted and prayed with her until the day she stood up boldly to the king. The play made an excellent parallel to Psalm 46:10 with Esther gaining courage by often reflecting on “Be still and know He is God.”

So here is another lesson I learned from Esther:

Pray hard before you speak (and act), and find support and prayer from people you trust. But as often holds true, Esther had to do the speaking; no one else could do it for her.

The story of Esther ends with her winning over the king’s favor and being able to overturn the edict to destroy the Jews. Esther had found her voice, and God gave her great favor.

In summary, how will you use your voice? For me, this looked like setting clear boundaries and speaking up when situations arose that I disagreed with. I also started making my own adult decisions.

Making your own adult decisions may be hard for some to understand, but when you grow up in an overprotective environment, any progress – no matter how small – is an achievement. It was hard at first and a process that I am still learning. But I have learned that it is okay to disagree with your peers respectfully. It is not sinning so long as it does not come against Scripture, and where this is any question, study the Word of God to find out what it says in context. Don’t be afraid to make mistakes; that’s part of living life and stepping out in faith.

God has given you a voice to use for His glory. What will you do with it? Will you shine like Esther? Or will you cower in fear?



Rebekah Wright is a fulltime retail worker who enjoys writing in her free time. Her previous accomplishments include blogging on apologetics (on and off under a pseudonym) for 10 years. She currently resides in New York with her fiancé and enjoys attending Church on Sunday mornings and hanging out with friends in her free time. Rebekah eventually wants get back into the blogging world with a focus on teaching the youth how to keep their faith strong in today’s culture. She can be found on Instagram here:


Wife of 20+ years. Mom to 3 children. Love sharing my life with weary hearts so that we can know the One who is Good, who is in Control, and Whose strength is made perfect in our weaknesses.