This past week marked the ten year anniversary of Zine’s MS diagnosis. I have managed to do a lot of reflecting over the last ten years. When I step back and look at what has gone on, it’s overwhelming to think about. However, in the middle there have been many lessons learned.
If you’ve not read our story, here are some major life points over the last ten years. Each one of these has a link to a blog post about that season in our life.
Zine had a suprapubic catheter inserted via outpatient surgery. At the time, this was a huge ordeal. Now, it seems like a small thing.
The Cancer Center became part of our life.
Zine’s first chemo treatment, but definitely not his last.
Multiple Pulmonary Emboli that almost took Zine’s life. A nightmare. It still is a nightmare when we look back and recount the details.
Central Line Surgery for Zine. So he had a port and a central line at the same time.
Plasmapheresis was not a pleasant experience for any of us.
A different chemo. A week long chemo treatment on an already weakened body.
Head lice. Not one child, not two, but all three!! It happened at the worst possible time too!
Eating Disorder Denial I had struggled with my eating for awhile, but never once did I think I had an eating disorder.
Rehab was hell. That’s how Zine still describes it to this day. I think my kids would say the same.
Eating Disorder Rearing Its Ugly Head
Pulmonary Emboli Again! Thankfully, I caught it this time earlier.
Shoulder Surgery wasn’t on my to-do list.
Eating Disorder Treatment Season.
My sweet Aunt Elaine and Uncle Ken went to be with Jesus within a few weeks of each other.
Soon after my dad passed away, but before I could articulate that in a blog post, this happend. Zine fell out of his wheelchair and broke his leg.
And currently, this is what our life looks like. I’m sure this video will make you laugh. It’s a HIPPA violation Zine says.
Yall, this is what Zine and I have gone through medically. This doesn’t even begin to touch the emotional struggles that have existed, nor does this include our children’s medical adventures!!!! I would say ten years has been full of one thing right after another.
I would say we have every right to be angry, bitter, mad at God, and ready to quit. But God!
Reflecting on God’s Goodness
[bctt tweet=”God is so good!” username=”Karen_Kay_Smith”]
God has held us close even when life sucks!
He tells us, in this world we will have trouble, but take heart He has overcome the world. We are looking forward to the day Zine is healed of this terrible disease.
Conner would say, well, I learned how to be an adult and my friends now ask me how to do it.
At 16, my son grew up way too fast. I never will forget a speech he gave me about giving them wings so they could fly.
God sends people into our life at just the right moment to minister to our hearts.
We don’t have all the same people around us that we did when we started this journey. This has been a struggle for sure, but God has proven over and over again that He brings the perfect people into our lives at the perfect time to love us well.
God uses our pain, to minister to others.
Just this last week, we spent some time with one of Krisann’s friend’s family. Her friend is in eating disorder treatment. God is using my pain to love this family well.
God has taught us how to love others in big ways because we have been loved in big ways.
Over the last ten years, I can’t tell you how much we have tangibly received from others. From movie night baskets, to secret Santa, to monetary donations, to meals delivered countless times, to donut doorstep drops, God and you have loved us well.
God has taught us how to receive from others, so we can lavishly give to others.
I remember when receiving gifts caused panic attacks. Not that I’m perfect at receiving now, but I have sure come a long way and learning to receive from others and from God.
God has taught us how to communicate in deep and personal ways. To enter into each other’s worlds.
We know how to have converstaions centered around how we feel and what we think. We haven’t always had the skills to do this.
God has worked miracles in our marriage.
From a total mess of a marriage, to a beautiful marriage, God has restored and resurrected this marriage of ours!
God has proved to us over and over again that His strength is perfect when our strength is gone!
I don’t know what the next ten years hold, but I know who holds the next ten years.
To be honest, I don’t want to imagine what the next ten years holds. It’s painful to think about. However, I am confident that whatever the next ten years brings, God will be there. He will be sending people to love us big, He will be holding us when we cannot carry on, and He will be working miracles that we might not see at the time. God will still be good, no matter what the next ten years hold.
