We are home from the hospital! Hip hip hooray! Thursday morning early, I was wondering if my child was going to survive this ordeal. Tonight we are sitting in the living room together. Thank you, Jesus!
Our night was better last night. We actually got a little sleep. Conner’s blood pressure stayed up, it’s still low but not in the danger zone like it was Wednesday night! He’s now taking some high powered antibiotics at home for two weeks. We are praying for no setbacks! As the doctor was giving us instructions for our departure he talks to us about how when you give these antibiotics you kill all bacteria even the good bacteria and tells us about some unpleasant side effects of that. So I am just praying against any unpleasant side effects. I’m also praying against any setbacks. We do not know want to end up back there again!!
Conner’s sweet girlfriend Sarah has been through so much emotional stress this week too. I just had to snap a picture of them one day! I’m grateful for the time I got to share with this sweet girl this week. To love her and to see her love for Conner has been a blessing. I told them over and over this week…it’s just a crappy experience. Terrible timing. Overwhelming Stress. First time for them to experience something like this. They have learned some valuable lessons this week. And their faith has been stretched. Even this morning as we talked about the things that God was bringing to the surface in our lives, we saw growing opportunities in our faith!
One of the things she struggled with as did Zine and I, was Conner has been the rock in our lives. And this week I realized just how much of a rock he is. When the thought that something was wrong with him came to my mind, I just thought Satan, move away! I found myself angry at Satan for his work! He and I have had some unpleasant words this week. And I have found myself claiming God’s power in Conner’s life over the power of the enemy! But the thoughts had the side effect of bricks setting on my chest. Suffocating feeling.
Zine has been extremely stressed this week. He has been the epitome of bad thinking! His thought patterns were continually negative and his thought pattern could not be changed. I may have even called him Nonnie a few times! He loved his Nonnie but in her late years, she was such a negative thinker. And Zine always complained about that. Then Zine went from negative thinking to Dr. Google. Just shoot us all! I thought if I heard Dr. Google one more time that I was going to have to come home and take his technology away. As Conner and I were discussing Zine today, Conner said, I”m dad’s security and I’m not home and he doesn’t know what to do. And I just realized how much Conner Smith has on his shoulders. It just became obvious to me how much this week!
Chloe has fairly well but as we are about to walk out of our hospital room this afternoon I start getting a book of text messages. She had reached her limit with everything. Thank goodness we were on our way home. Thank goodness for our sweet friend coming and bringing some calmness to Chloe this week. Something as simple as putting my dishes in the dishwasher brought sweet Chloe’s anxiety level down.
Krisann has needed a little mom time when I got home. But Krisann has done pretty well this week. Chloe has bragged on her. I guess it must be that dinner delivery by a friend last night that even let Krisnan give her a manicure. I heard all about that manicure!! Sometimes, folks, it’s the little things we do that mean the most! Taking that five extra minutes to let Krisann paint your finger nails made a huge place of comfort for Krisann. I prepared Conner and Sarah that Krisann might be a basket case this afternoon. But as we came home and did a little cleaning up from a week away from mom, Krisann and Sarah worked very hard to help me and there was no gnashing of teeth. Krisann has done very well all afternoon. She has a few moments but not terrible. Then I showed Krisann how to use a needle and thread so she has been busy making Barbie pillows! I didn’t do that on purpose but it was a good thing that gave us all some quiet time. And it was something she has been wanting to learn for a long time. So it was perfect timing and God’s creative idea to do that this afternoon.
I am headed to bed one exhausted mama tonight, but one grateful mama! This afternoon, I have found myself feeling emotionally worn down. It’s like no one please ask me for anything emotionally. I’m spent. And then tonight some sweet friends brought dinner for us and for them and we sat in the living room and ate dinner together. How that did my heart good!! Grateful to be home, praying for no setbacks or side effects, and hoping that tonight brings sweet rest for us all. We ALL need some rest!
