My lesson for this week:  When God schedules your appointments, it is simply His way to say I am in your midst!

From heart ablation to heartbreaking situations to anxiety about possible chemo season again, many things are going on in the Smith household.  There’s one situation that I won’t write about that has my heart so hurt and so confused.  In the midst of much hurt, I have tried to choose to love big.  Last night, this thing evolved into something much bigger than I expected.  It is easy to lose my focus when I am in the middle of difficulties.  Therefore, I was so thankful when God just opened my eyes to the fact He was right in the middle of the schedules of our lives.

Chloe Update

Chloe, who struggles with migraines, has MD, and a movement disorder, began Christmas Day not feeling well.  I thought she might have a migraine…however she said she didn’t think that was what it was.   Her health continued to decline over the next week.  On New Years Day, my heart knew there was a new problem.

The day after my heart ablation I drag myself out of my house and take her to the doctor for some fairly alarming symptoms.  Lousy decision yes, but I still say sometimes a mama has to do things that others can’t.  Last week, she was sent to the ER.  The doctor wanted to see if she had appendicitis.  Not that.  Her lab work continued to be about the same, a little off, but not radically off from where it should be.

Although my mom heart was very unsettled, I wasn’t sure what else to do.  She has been so sick that many days she has only gotten out of bed to come to the sofa to sleep.  Her color is very pale.  Her blood counts have been a bit low which caused low blood pressure and high heart rate.  There were no definite answers to what was going on.

When I don’t know what to do, I simply go to Jesus.

I find that my sleep is interrupted when things are bothering me.  I had a friend say once she didn’t rest because she was fretting and sweating.  However, I find in the middle of the night is when God calms my heart and I feel nearer to Him than many other times.  So I found myself several nights, lamenting with Jesus over my girl and begging for wisdom.  Little did I know, God’s plan was already in the works.

Sometimes I think doctors are just angels on earth!

Thursday of last week, Chloe had a regularly scheduled neurologist appointment.  The neurologist walked into the room and immediately said, “Chloe, you look awful.  Mom, I do not like the way she looks.”  As we shared what had been going on and as the doctor pulled all the lab work, she began to put pieces of the puzzle together.  We left her office with an appointment with a gastroenterologist for this week.  Her concern was that some of the migraine medications they have given Chloe had caused some damage to her intestinal track.

Yesterday, we saw a brand new doctor.  When the nurse, who has never seen Chloe called her back and said, “I can tell this girl doesn’t feel well just by looking at her,” you know your child must not look well.

We did learn some things yesterday.  The CT scan revealed a small kidney stone.  We also learned that possibly because of the muscular dystrophy there is a problem with her bladder that will most likely need to be addressed later.  However, it seems that this gastro dr believes there is very possibly something more going on.

One of the doctor’s possibilities is that many of her symptoms are symptoms of celiac disease.  There is also the concern of the effects medication has taken as well.  So Monday morning, Chloe will be having some outpatient testing done at the hospital, in an effort to diagnose what is happening within this girl.  None of us are very excited about these tests.  Because of her MD, procedures take much longer for her to recover than healthy people.  Secondly, because of extreme anxiety, things that should be simple are not simple at all.

When God Schedules

Here is what I want to point out, [bctt tweet=”When God schedules your appointments, His timing is always best!” username=”kksmith8694″] Her checkup with the neurologist was most definitely a God scheduled appointment.  Next, it takes several weeks to get in with gastroenterologists around here, but God scheduled one within a week for her.  Third, we saw this new doctor on Friday, and for the very next working day, God schedules the outpatient testing.  Y’all, that’s just unheard of!

I could bemoan the fact that Chloe has gone through so much and I just want her to be healthy, which I have at times.  However, if that is my focus all the time, then I would miss seeing God at work.  In the middle of trying circumstances, it is easy to lose my focus.  However, I am so thankful that over the years, I have trained myself to look for God’s fingerprints in the middle of the difficult.  Know what I have learned? [bctt tweet=”God is always faithful to be all up in my business, I just need to keep my focus on Him.” username=”kksmith8694″]  And this difficult situation, proves that lesson!  God orchestrating schedules is just His fingerprints in our lives.

For our prayer warriors

Pray for wisdom for the doctor and peace for Chloe and us.

For this situation, which has just wreaked havoc in my heart, please pray for God to pour His wisdom into me and His healing in my heart.

Lastly, next week (the 31st), Zine has an MRI and doctors appointment where we will learn if chemo is in our future.  The chemo he took was designed to be taken only twice.  However, when we saw the doctor last time, he informed us that it was possible that we might need to continue with the chemo.  This possibility sweet friends brings a total sense of apprehension and anxiety as we lead up to that appointment.  We know God has been present in every chemo season!  However, can we say, we do NOT want this in our lives!  So selfishly, we pray for no chemo, but we want God’s will to be orchestrated so if that means chemo, then we will endure chemo because we desire His will in our lives.