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This week has been unbelievable.  On Sunday night as we already shared Zine took a fall.  On Monday, we had an encounter with “an angel” at the hospital.  One would think that after such an encounter that life would be awesome.  Well, life has been very difficult.  We have had numerous in depth conversations about how life has become, how life needs to change, how Satan is stealing, killing, and destroying, and the list could continue.  It has been emotionally draining!!  But I am so thankful for even the little improvements!!  I will take progress any day!  And I will take the fact that Zine and I have communicated and discussed and not yelled, belittled, given silent treatments, gotten lividly angry as great progress.  We just have had the opportunity to work on communication skills in marriage a lot!

After our visit to Madison Hospital, I then made it to Birmingham for my one month follow up from my surgery.    Now…when I first came home from hospital I got to do physical therapy with this stick every hour.  And let me just say…it was torture.  My mouth indeed did not open to that marked line, until about try number 5 or 6.  I was supposed to do these exercises 10 times for a count to 10 every hour.  And then at 2 weeks post op, I was able to go to 5 times a day!  I was so sure that when I went back this time, he would say I could stop!  But oh no!!  It didn’t work that way at all!  Scar tissue is beginning to form and things were not opening like he wanted.  So I’m back to the stick every hour!  Arghhh!!!  I have been very diligent to do these exercises because the thought of having to do that surgery again because scar tissue built up definitely doesn’t warm my heart!!  So…the stick and I are getting to be very good friends.

I left Birmingham late afternoon and travelled home to have a painting night with these fun ladies.

I REALLY can not be this old!  I can not be old enough to have a son with a drivers license, a girlfriend, a job, and now a checking account.  Where has time gone?  But this guy…is an amazing guy!!

The rest of Thursday was spent in counseling session with Chloe and I.  It was one of those sessions where I walked away and went…wow I didn’t know we had THAT much going on in our lives.  To summarize the counselor said in closing…let’s think about this…1, 2, 3, and she continued to count to 7.  7 major things that are going on in your lives.  Well, when she put it in summary like that I saw for the first time what all was going on.  When you live in chaos…you just function.  You guys think all the time, we have so much going on!  But that’s not how we feel about it the majority of the time.  We are just in the middle of life, making schedules work, finding time for rest, fun, work, etc.  Just like normal people.  Except ours usually has numerous medical appts on regular basis.  And when it is summarized 1 thru 7 it didn’t sound too normal! But just when you think wow, our plate is full…there’s this phone call.

Mr. Smith is to report to an ophthalmologist office in Cullman at 7:40 Friday morning!  YIKES!!  This wasn’t on my to do list either!! He had been to the eye dr here in Huntsville.  There was some concern about one of the tests that they did.  The eye dr called Dr. L, our neurologist.  And then called us late on Thursday afternoon and asked us to be there the next morning to see this specialist.  They did have equipment to do some testing that most do not.  As it turns out the test the dr was worried about here….well…it turned out fine.  But what we did learn, the issues with vision are actually not related to his eyes.  They are all neurological!  The doctor said he was almost certain that Zine had a lesion that had developed across his brain stem.  That so far things were still communicating but they were a lot slower to communicate.  Many of you may have noticed that you can talk to Zine and it appears that he’s not looking at you.  His eyes do not work together…they actually work against each other.  When his eyes aren’t working together it also makes his depth perception way off.  Which we notice this difficulty the most with driving!!  Making driving decisions or rather when is it time to not drive can be VERY difficult.  For those of you that maybe have older parents you can sympathize.  However, the difference between an older parent and Zine is he’s young.  He still desires to work for as long as possible.  He is needed to help with kids.    So this is an area that doesn’t have cut and dry decision in.  The eyes technically work.  But the problem is everything is slower to connect.  And depth perception is off.  The dr. did say to give plenty of space between you and car in front of you!  But he definitely didn’t say no more driving either!  But this is one of those areas that I pray about everyday.  That God would give us great wisdom to know when the time has come that driving is no longer safe.  And when that day comes…it is going to be a VERY SAD day in the life of the Smith Family.

Zine is scheduled for an MRI on Dec. 2.  And then we are scheduled to see the neurologist that afternoon.  They will be able to tell from that if there is a lesion across his brainstem.  But we are pretty certain there are many new lesions so we don’t really need an MRI to confirm that!  Chemo hasn’t worked and that’s obvious!  Now we move forward to next drug.  That decision will be made on Dec. 2.  So we know we are in for life changes again.  But I have to admit, not having chemo looming over our heads while his lungs have healed has been very nice reprieve.

By the time Friday night got here…I was past going!  I really thought I might be sick.  I got in the bed at 8:30.  That never, I say NEVER happens!!  But my body was done!!

So…we are glad this week is almost over!!  And we are praying for God to strengthen our tired worn out bodies!  We are continuing to pray that our angel encounter will make long term changes in the relationships in our home.  That God would continue to give wisdom as needed.  Praying that God would fill our home with peace and joy and contentment despite the difficult circumstances that exist.  And extremely grateful that God chose a simple person to communicate big things to us this week.  Pretty sure I will NEVER forget that experience!  Also grateful that the week that went and went and went some more is almost over!